hello 2010

I realize I’m twelve days late for the “Welcome to the New Year”-shebang, but up until recently 2010 didn’t really feel like the start of anything, much less a new decade. While I’m at it, the year in review:

January

• Started this blog. Wrote a lot while mostly trying to figure out what I wanted from life, especially after grades came out first quarter. Got trashed a few times and felt shitty while trying to get that “lease on life.” Studied. Studied. Studied.

February

• Went home for President’s Day, which was fine until Epic Fight with father. Didn’t talk to him for four months (have yet to grow out of holding grudges). Relationship with boyfriend coming along swimmingly and thought about sex a lot. The internet didn’t help with that one, as everyone seemed to be thinking about sex during February. Questioned what I wanted to do with my life.

March

• Finished the quarter and went to visit the boyfriend on the east coast. Trekked along in NYC and romanticized the idea of moving there when I’m worldly and 24. Quickly came down back to earth after realizing what a ridiculous and unrealistic idea it was. Had massive fight with suitemates over living situation for the next year and held a grudge.

April

• Started a new quarter. Life was good. Went to a lot of concerts and the beach. Had a lot of weird thoughts about my relationship and didn’t realize that they were actually warning signs about the shit-storm that was to come. Won a blow-up doll. Made up with suitemates, grew closer to roommate. Good shit.

May

• Went through too many complicated issues with the boyfriend. Didn’t want to break up but knew what we were doing wasn’t working. Worried about classes and grades a lot. Visited home and made up with Dad after being threatened by Mom. Things were cool by the end of the visit.

Summer

• June-August came and went in a blur of happy memories and good food. Made up with boyfriend by seeing him all the time and talking about it. Made up with Dad by not getting in each other’s hair and not talking about it. Decided to join a sorority. Turned 19.

September

• Came back to school. Partied. Too much alcohol (I think). So much school work. Barely writing.

October

• Rushed and got into a sorority I liked and learned to love. Things are great with the boyfriend, with the new friends, with the roommates. Classes are coming along swimmingly, though I’m eating ramen basically every day. Life is alright. Still not writing.

November

• Life becomes whirl of homework, parties, and people. Having minor fights with boyfriend over somewhat serious/somewhat stupid stuff, which resulted in a lot of two hour long walks at 10 at night. Not thinking about anything but getting into grad school. The whole “future” issue seems to have disappeared, though I’m still fidgeting over it. Wanting to write again.

December

• Studying. Not sleeping enough. So, so ready to go home for Winter Break. Plans were made to visit New York. Plans fell through. Searched for a puppy for Mom and made up with boyfriend. Minor incidences of annoyance with parents. Bearable, through and through. Job searched.

And now? Well, January’s come and is halfway over, and I’m doing good for myself. After intensively dating PortTriton (UCSD’s job listing site), I found a job at a biomedical research lab, where I have a contract to work for at least through the summer and an extended offer to work through the next school year as well. Though it’s only second week, I’m doing my best to stay motivated and get my work in order. I’ve re-resolved to write more (hello, resolution of last year that resulted in this blog) and to care less about what people think of it. Things between the boyfriend and I are good (twenty-one months today!), as are relations with roommates and friends. I’m turning twenty this year, and life looks good.

The whole growing-up in college thing really surprises me sometimes. Having a successful long distance relationship, making friends outside of my established circle, going Greek, and getting a job—these are all things that I thought about but could have never predicted. I’m still making goals for myself, but I’m in no rush. One thing I learned from 2009 is to relax a little bit, so I’m going to do just that. Things will work out because things always work out, and that’s that.